If Team Galactic and I Had A Random Conversation
by Haine-chan
Summary: This is what happens when you give me a computer and some free time. A random conversation with lots of different topics including the four commanders of Team Galactic and Cyrus himself. Other characters will appear.
1. Team Rocket

**This is the fanfiction that isn't really a fanfiction I said I would write about Team Galactic and if I had a random conversation with them. Topics will be random. Just like this story. I do not own anything. Please feel free to message me and suggest future topics! Or you can tell me that this is absolute crap. And I must thank SparkleDazzleDuez for inspiring me to make my own talk-show thingy. (Read 'What the vexos think' by her and you'll know what I'm talking about) I commend you! Now, Onward! TO SUBWAY!**

Haine-chan – So, this is going to be some kind of chatroom where I'll ask you, Team Galactic, random questions that come to my mind and you'll answer them. It could include what you think of people, you next move in TG…etc.

So, first question, what do you think of Team Rocket?

Saturn – They are just a bunch of losers who have nothing to do but sit in and ruin our plans.

Mars – They were the ones who totally bombarded my plans at Iron Island; what would make you think I'd like them?

Charon – All they do is say that stupid motto and interrupt my thinking!

Jupiter – What's so great about a group of ninnies like them?

Cyrus – Incompetent fools.

Haine-chan – So you guys have nothing good to say about them? At all?

All – No.

Haine-chan – Well, how about the executives?

Saturn – What executives?

Haine-chan – Have you ever played--? Nope, that wouldn't make any sense. Well, they're really awesome, really cool people who are trying to resurrect the old Team Rocket and bring back Giovanni!

Mars – Giovanni?

Cyrus – Resurrected team?

Jupiter – Ooh, is this Giovanni dude hot?

(Awkward silence)

Jupiter – What, I had to ask!

Haine-chan – Okay then…but yeah, here, I'll show you some pictures!

(Boots up computer and looks up the executives on Google.)

Haine-chan – Aren't they cool?

Saturn – Who's the man with the blue hair that strangely reminds me of myself?

Mars - And who's the girl with hair almost as red as mine?

Cyrus – Is there any kind of boss in this team?

Charon – Why aren't there any geezers in this team?!

Jupiter – And what's that teal-haired guy's number?

(Another awkward silence)

Jupiter – Seriously, what's with all of the awkward pauses?!

Haine-chan – Well, to answer your questions, Archer is the one who strangely looks like you, Saturn. The redhead is Ariana, Mars. Giovanni is the boss who these guys are trying to bring out of solitary training, Cyrus. There is NEVER ANY GEEZERS IN ANY VILLAINOUS TEAM! (The only exception is you, Charon.) And, finally, PROTON IS MINE! BACK OFF!

(Jupiter backs into corner and starts crying)

Haine-chan – Now that we've got that under control…what do you think of them now?

Saturn – Can I blow them up?

Haine-chan – NO!

Saturn – Curses…

**And that concludes our first segment of "If Team Galactic and I Had a Random Conversation"! tune in next time and feel free to suggest future topics! And yes, they can be about such random things, like pie.**

**Charon – Did someone say pie?**

**Haine-chan – Yes, and you're not getting any!**

**Charon- Aw…**


	2. The Biggest Loser in TG

**Second topic everyone! Sorry it took so long, I'm trying to update everything at the same time! Oh noes! Anywho, this chapter will focus on the idea sent to me by Selena Skye. Here's the review:**

lol XD this is so funny! Team Galactic rocks! Now lemme see...random topic...AH! Talk about who´s the biggest loser in Team Galactic!

**So that is what we're talking about on this fine morning! Enjoy and message topics!**

Haine-chan: I have a request everyone!

(All groan in despair)

Haine-chan: Stop being such ninnies! It's not that bad! The question is…Who do you think is the biggest loser in Team Galactic?

Mars, Saturn and Jupiter: Charon.

Haine-chan: Wow, that didn't take long.

Charon: How dare you say that about me! I am the great Charon; no one calls me a loser!

Haine-chan: Then who do you think is the loser?

Charon: Cyrus is!

Mars, Saturn and Jupiter: WHAT?!

Charon: You heard me! All he does is sulk about how 'incomplete human spirit is'! He has one, after all, so why does he complain about others? He's just as bad as they are! And besides, that 'new world' he wants to build is going to be for me, and me alone!

(Cyrus walks in with a Tim Horton's coffee in hand)

Cyrus: Did someone say something that included loser and incomplete spirit?

Saturn (kissing his feet): Oh, forgive him, Master! He knew not what he was saying! Don't kill me!! IT is them who should be punished!

(Mars and Jupiter smack their hands on their heads)

Mars: Just typical; he is a suck-up! He doesn't care about us; he only cares about pleasing Cyrus!

Jupiter: Aw, is Marsy feeling a little jealous?

Mars (blushing): ...No…

Jupiter: You're blushing! You DO like him don't you? We so have to play seven Minutes in Heaven!

Mars: N-no!

Haine-chan: We're getting off topic! Cyrus, who do you think is the biggest loser in Team Galactic?

Cyrus (pondering the question): That would have to be…

(Sweat drop)

Cyrus: Saturn.

(Saturn faints in shock)

All: Seriously?!?!?!?!?

Cyrus: He has failed me numerous times and has been kissing up to me since he joined this team. If you want to classify him as a 'loser' then go ahead.

Mars (rushes over to Saturn and starts shaking him violently): C'mon, Saturn! WAKE UP!

Jupiter: Why don't you do mouth-to-mouth?

(Mars blushes)

Jupiter: Did you die your face the same colour as your hair? OR are you always that flushed?

Mars: Shut up! At least I'M not the one who's in love with the enemy!

Haine-chan: You know who I think the biggest loser is?

(All stop to stare at Haine-chan)

All: Who, Haine?

Haine-chan: ...

All: WELL?!

Haine-chan: Mars!

Jupiter: Everyone knows that.

Mars: Then why didn't you vote for me then?

Jupiter: I can tolerate you, if I have to, but Charon? Have you heard that laughter? IT annoys the CRAP outta me! Sure, you're annoying and you're a loser, but compared to him, you're a defenseless Glameow!

(Sweat drop)

Mars: WANNA SAY THAT TO MY FACE?!~

Haine-chan: So, there you have it folks! The biggest loser(s) in Team Galactic! I hope you enjoyed it! I'll try and include your topics in future chappies~! Stay tuned!


	3. People Who Heckle and Make Fun of Them

**SO! Everyone likes this! I'm happy. But I know the commanders aren't…don't give me that look! Anywho, today's topic has been carefully chosen by… (Drum roll please)………PeachyKeenx088! Yeah! And this is the review…**

_LMAO! This is actually quite entertaining. I love Saturn. He's my favorite character from Pokemon so far I think. As for a topic ... hmmm .... you should talk how they feel about everyone thinking they're complete and total weirdo's because of their strange haircuts, outlandish outfits, and new world speak because everyone in the anime and games are always saying that. What are their defenses to that?_

**Wow, 8 reviews and lots of topics! SQUEE! I thought this was really lame at first. Oh, and Charon won't be in this chappie (everyone screams in excitement). Wow, I didn't think you hated him that much.**

**Saturn: WE DO!**

**Point proven. Anywho, let's start! Cyrus, take it away.**

Cyrus- Thank you, Haine-chan. I think that people are ignorant and impudent, and that they do not have the intelligence to comprehend the sheer force of what Team Galactic is about to unleash! And, as this so-called PeachyKeenx088 or whatever, says people in both the anime and the games are constantly heckling us at random points. I do agree with that, but they are utterly annoying! If I could re-create the Red Chain, I would be able to rid myself of those incompetent pests!

Haine-chan- …Wow, Cyrus, that was a long monologue.

(All commanders are asleep)

Cyrus- You fools! Were you not listening to my perfectly-planned monologue?

(All groggily wake up)

Mars- Where's the fire…?

Jupiter- Where's Looker?

*Awkward silence*

Jupiter- All right, these awkward silences are getting on my nerves!

Saturn- O-oh, Cyrus s-sir! We were just…uh…

Cyrus- Yes?

Saturn- Dozing off while you ranted?

Cyrus- You know, you're lucky you have fan girls.

Mars- What does that have to do with the fact that you were going to kick the living daylights outta him?

Cyrus- Well, when you have fan-girls, and you openly threaten them, they, well, make a cult against you and try to kill you for the comment.

Jupiter and Mars- Really…?

(Scans reviews)

Jupiter- Wait, it did say that he was PeachyKeenx088's favourite commander…

(PeachyKeenx088 and horde of fan-girls approach Cyrus)

PeachyKeenx088- ATTACK!

Cyrus- What the--?

(Fan-girls swarm and beat Cyrus)

Haine-chan- 0_0; Anywho…what do you guys think about the constant nagging about your, well, let's just say, outlook?

Mars- People should learn to stay out of our way and mind their own business!

Jupiter- Yeah! People are so ignorant and rude! Compared to us, they're the freaks!

Mars- Wait…did we just…agree on something?

Jupiter- I think we did…

*Silence*

Both- CATFIGHT!

Haine-chan- O_O;

Saturn- Don't worry; they do this all the time.

Haine-chan- Then why aren't they dead yet?

Saturn- Well…honestly, I don't even know myself.

Haine-chan- While everyone else is either being trampled on or trampling someone, what do YOU think of all of the heckling that you have to deal with?

Saturn-…Hmm…

Haine-chan- Yes?

Saturn- Everyone should just leave us alone. We do what we want and they do what they want. Even if we want to re-create the world in our own image. Oh, and PeachyKeenx088 spelled 'weirdoes' wrong. Get a spell checker or something.

Haine-chan- Well rounded, Saturn! Here, have a cookie!

Saturn (looking at cookie in dismay)- Why are people so obsessed with these things…?

Haine-chan- That was another refreshing chappie of If Team Galactic and I Had A Random Conversation! Tune in next time! OH, and PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!

Saturn- Just do it.


	4. Who They 'Like' Like

**Fourth topic time! I didn't think this would last so long. I promise I'll do everyone's topic before the end of this fic! That just means it will be, like, twenty chapters...I wonder if everyone minds? With so many reviews, I don't know what topic to pick! Maybe we should pick it out of a hat...but who has a hat that I could use? (*devil eyes*) I've got an idea...**

(Drags Giovanni out of Tohjo falls)

Haine-chan - I'll need your hat.

Giovanni – No.

Haine-chan- Is that a message coming in from Team Rocket?

Giovanni – Where?

(Swipes hat while not looking)

Giovanni – Hey!

(Places ballots in hat) Haine-chan – Who wants to do the honour?

Charon – I wasn't in the last chapter, so I should be the one who picks it out!

Haine-chan – Whatever...

(Charon ruffles through hat and picks out paper)

Charon - Belphegor and Rasiel.

_O:_

I am intrigued. And for the record, Cyrus is my favorite, with his sexy cobalt hair and sociopathic tendencies. -huggles her wounded Cyrus and glares at horde of fangirls- No touch.

Oh, and for an idea, why not have guest stars like Dawn and Lucas? I think that'd be a neat addition. Great job so far!

And one more thing... I love Cyrus! :D

Haine-chan – Ooh...can't do that one.

Charon – And why not?

Haine-chan – I have to find people willing to talk to us before I update. I promise I'll do yours next time! Hey Cyrus, you have a fan girl! ^^

Cyrus (blandly) – Oh, joy.

Haine-chan - I knew you'd be happy!

Charon – You staged that.

Haine-chan – Fine, then if I staged it why don't you let Saturn choose?

Charon – FINE!

(Hands Saturn hat)

Saturn – saturnrocks101

Charon – I TOLD YOU IT WAS RIGGED! This is unacceptable! I AM CHARON FOR ARCEUS' SAKE!

Haine-chan O_o Take a chill pill, Charon. Let's see what it says...

_all 3 are so funny_

maybe u should do a thing where they talk about TG dating

like who like who

And that will be the topic! Go on, talk!

(Awkward silence)

Haine-chan – Fine, be that way! So Mars...is it true you love Saturn?

Mars – W-w-w-w-w-w-what? H-h-h-h-ow I mean w-w-w-w-w-why would think that?

Jupiter – Hee hee, see I'm not the only one who knows.

Saturn (blushing) – That isn't true, is it?

Haine-chan – Oh, I think it is, Satty! Don't you feel the same way?

(Cowers behind Cyrus)

Cyrus – What are you doing?

Haine-chan – I think I need to torture someone else. Jupy, don't you like a certain police officer who's out to get TG?

Jupiter – That would be going against everything we stand for! Who gave you that idea?

Mars – Really now? Then why do you have all of those flirtatious letters under your bed? We should really play Truth or Dare!

Jupiter - HOW DID YOU FIND THEM!

Haine-chan – I know Cyrus doesn't like anyone and Charon's old and not friendly.

Charon – HEY!

Haine-chan – So I guess that wraps up this exciting installment! See you in the next topic!


	5. Guest Stars and Team Magma & Aqua

**Hello again, my peeps! I'm getting into a writing mood, so I'll be updating more of my stories. (Maybe even the ones I've neglected! ) And I don't really like sticking to a specific date for updating for some reason. I like the freedom of updating whenever possible. So I might just do that again. XD. And now, onto the topic I neglected in the last chappie! **

_Belphegor and Rasiel._

_O:_

_I am intrigued. And for the record, Cyrus is my favorite, with his sexy cobalt hair and sociopathic tendencies. -huggles her wounded Cyrus and glares at horde of fangirls- No touch._

_Oh, and for an idea, why not have guest stars like Dawn and Lucas? I think that'd be a neat addition. Great job so far!_

_And one more thing... I love Cyrus! :D_

**After a few hours of phone calls and some persuasion (not to mention cookies) I have gotten Zoey and Dawn! Welcome!**

Zoey – Why did you drag us here against our will?

Dawn – Yeah, we don't even like Team Gala—

Haine-chan – Shh! They'll hear you!

Saturn – Too late now.

(Sweat drop)

Jupiter – Just so you know, we don't like you either.

Haine-chan – On that happy note, I have picked a topic that we'll all talk about! Wow, a double whamie!

Saturn – False Enthusiasm.

Haine-chan – Oh, cheer up, Satty! And the topic is chosen by none other than... TheNamelessV-2!

_You talked about Team Rocket, but what about Team Aqua/Magma?_

Now talk!

All – Who are they?

Haine-chan – O_o I knew this was going to happen. Um...let's see...hey! Gimme a minute.

(After hours of draining phone calls and a persuasive session, Haine-chan returns to the rather ticked off group...)

Haine-chan – Okay, so it was a mistake to invite Zoey and Dawn...

Zoey and Dawn – Does that mean we can go now?

Haine-chan – No. But I've found someone who CAN explain...

May – Dawn? Zoey? What are you doing here?

Both – We'd like to know.

Haine-chan – So May, tell us who Team Aqua and Team Magma are...

May – Right! So they're these evil organizations who want to either expand the land mass of the earth or expand the sea! I was kidnapped by Team Magma and lemme tell you, it was AWKWARD!

Cyrus – They seem impudent. Who would want to expand a world which is not even fit for me?

Jupiter – Well, if you ask me—

All – WE DON'T!

Jupiter – Oh, whatever! I'll get my turn next topic!

Haine-chan – Or will you?

Mars – I go with Team Magma. After all, the planet IS 70% water.

Charon – Who knew you actually had something in that tiny brain of yours that isn't connected with Saturn...hee hee hee...

Mars (blushing) - OH, shut your yap you geezer!

Saturn – I agree with Team Aqua. People are clogging water ways and destroying marshes to build houses and roads. Do they know how many species of rare animals they're killing by doing that? Do they know they'll never be able to recreate something like that? It's their home and they deserve to keep it in its natural state. It's completely irrational and stupid. I will never understand people like them...

Haine-chan – Wow Saturn, I didn't think you had such a deep passion for wildlife and marshlands. Maybe you should join them.

Saturn – While I'm concerned for the sake of the world, I'm still rooting for Cyrus and TG.

Haine-chan – That makes absolutely no sense...but we should have a topic about concerns like that. Especially animal cruelty...

Dawn – Can I say something?

Zoey – Me too?

Haine-chan – Go ahead.

Dawn – I think ALL of the villainous teams in the Pokemon world are just plain NUTS! I don't know what they want or why they do the things they do, but their completely stupid and make no sense at all! I mean, really, a new world? The one we have here is just fine the way it is.

Zoey – You tell 'em, Dawn!

Haine-chan – You got anything to add, Zoey?

Zoey – Well, I agree with Dawn but I have to add that no matter what they do, they'll always realize the error of their ways.

Haine-chan – Well rounded. And I think we've run out of time. I wonder if the people who follow this FF agree with Saturn... Until next time!


	6. Co  Workers VS Ash and Co

**Greetings to you all, wonderful followers of this FF! I hope you're all enjoying your summers. I know I am. But I'm going off on a tangent. Lovely, eh? xD And this week's topic is...**

Calvarygirl15!

_Very funny! You should do who they hate more. their coworkers or ash and the gang._

**This should be interesting...**

Saturn – My answer is automatic.

Mars – Same with me.

Jupiter - Well...when you have those two choices...I...uh...

Cyrus – My answer was decided along with my destiny.

Haine-chan – Jupy? How 'bout you?

Jupiter – Uh...well...I...

Charon – Just say them already!

Haine-chan – Okay, since Jupiter can't seem to utter a complete sentence, Saturn, can you start us off?

Saturn – Co-workers.

Mars – Ditto.

Jupiter – What does this have to do with that Pokemon?

Mars (face palm) – It's a figure of speech, smarts. Oi, this is why I said co-workers...

Saturn – Exactly.

Cyrus – Ash and co. Why is it that they feel the over-bearing need to meddle and ruin my meticulous plans? Do they not know the sheer force of what we, as Team Galactic, are trying to harness and unleash? And those OBSCENE outfits! Can someone tell that mousy little girl with the blue hair to wear a skirt that exceeds a length of five inches? Children should not even be able to go on 'adventures' at such a young age, not to mention spy on adult business!

Dawn – Hey! I like my outfit, thank you very much!

Cyrus (somewhat shocked) – What? Where have you been all this time?

Dawn – We were in the backroom eating doughnuts and spying on you guys, like you just said we do ALL THE TIME.

TG – We?

Dawn – Yeah! Ash, Brock and I!

(Sweatdrop)

TG – _Haine...!_

Haine-chan – What? It's not like I FORCED them to stay...

Dawn – All of the free food and accommodations helped though.

(Evil eyes to Haine)

Haine-chan – What if I said that you could get the room next topic?

(Grumble)

Saturn – Fine...

Mars – Whatever...

Jupiter – I wish Looker were here...

Ash – Well, you're in luck! Last time I checked, he was just in the back, fixing the chocolate fountain! HEY LOOKER! Jupiter wants to see you!

Jupiter (blushing) – What? I didn't mean it that way! It was just—well, you know, I was interested in seeing if—uh...he was...OH CRUD CAKES!

(Enter Looker with a plate of chocolate strawberries and other assorted fruit.)

Looker – Thanks for the tip off, Haine-chan! All of this crime work sure does make me hungry—

(When he notices Jupiter he drops plate on ground)

Haine-chan – Oh, Looker, now look what you've done! This was a nice Persian carpet, too!

Dawn – Did you just use his name as a pun?

Haine-chan – Not intentionally, but now that you think of it SURE LET'S GO WITH THAT! ^.^

Looker – Why is she here?

Jupiter – Yeah, why AM I here anyways? OH would you look at the time! I have some Lake Guardians to feed! Ahahahahahhahaha!

All – What?

(She tries to open doors, but all are locked)

Jupiter – Stupid contraptions!

Ash – Hey, Looker, I think she's_ looking_ you out! HA HA! Get it? Instead of 'checking' out I said 'looking' out! I'm a regular comedian! (Rolls on floor laughing his guts out)

Haine-chan – _ Not funny. (*to side* Ash's lame sense of huumour makes its appearance! X_X)

Brock – Now you know how we feel.

Charon – I didn't get to say who I despise more!

Haine-chan – x_x~ Go ahead, be my guest.

Charon – Well, I would have to say my co-workers! All they ever do is go on about how 'incomplete human spirit is'! We're all human here! And, seriously, creating a new world? What ludicrous suggestion is that? If you ask me...

(Charon continues to rant while Jupiter tries to run away from Looker. Ash picks up Looker's discarded plate and starts to eat the hairy fruit and chocolate. Dawn is about to puke and Brock is staring at Mars and attempting to hit on her. Mars is giving him and Saturn is looking a bit furious. Cyrus has left the building)

Haine-chan – While no one's paying attention, I should wrap this up. Thank you for reading and I hope to see you in the next topic! ^.^


	7. Shippings

**Greetings to you all, my lovely readers! I have come back for yet another topic, all for your entertainment! Now I'm ripping off Adam Lambert...xD And this chappie's topic is...**

I'mSlowlyGoingInsane

Hmmm...let's see...oh I got it.

What do the Commanders (and Cyrus)think about some of the ships they have...

And boy are there a lot of them~

**Alright, let's start with Mars!**

Mars' Shippings:

BetelgeuseShipping- Mars & Cyrus

Mars: Oh please:l ike this man could ever have the ability to love ANYTHING! If he did, it would probably be one of his Pokemon, certainly not me! (To side: Although it would be nice...)

ColdGalaxyShipping - Paul & Mars

Mars: Have I ever met this kid?

ConjuctionShipping- Saturn & Mars

Mars: (*blushing madly*) Well...if you insist we get together...I wouldn't say no...

CyrusGroupieShipping - Charon & Mars

Mars: NEXT SHIPPING PLEASE!

DeimosShipping - Mars & Purugly

Mars: Don't get me wrong—I really like my purugly. But loving it so much that it needs a one-shot? No.

ExodiaShipping - Mars & Arceus

Mars: Would that even be possible...? (*starts pondering the thought*)

GalacticBombShipping - Barry & Mars

Mars: I'd be afraid that every time I see him, he'd fine me for something stupid, like not wearing the right make-up or something...

GingerLeziShipping - Zoey & Mars

Mars: Again, I don't even know her! And I'm straight!

IndieShipping - Ash & Mars

Mars: Hehe...no.

PanatikoShipping - Brock & Mars

Mars: He looks weird. I mean, does he even have eyes?

ProwessShipping - Cynthia & Mars

Mars: STRAIGHT.

SeleneShipping - Detective Looker & Mars

Mars: Jupiter can have him!

SinfulShipping - Mars & Jupiter

Mars: ...O_o No way on Earth.

**Haine-chan – That was fun! Now onto Jupiter! She doesn't have many...**

Jupiter's Shippings:

ComelyShipping - Detective Looker & Jupiter

Jupiter: (*blushing uncontrollably*) I—uh—well—I told him he was my type—and—ugh—I LOVE HIM!

Mars: WHAT?

Saturn: Wow, didn't think she'd confess.

Cyrus: What...? She loves the enemy...? What had this world come to...?

HAinec-ahn – Ooh, kawaii! : 3

DiscourageShipping - Barry & Jupiter

Jupiter: Too many fines. I'm not THAT rich.

JovianShipping - Jupiter & Saturn

Jupiter: Oh, please, everyone knows Mars' is head-over-heels in loooooove with him and he is too!

RetroShipping - Dawn & Jupiter

Jupiter: OMG. Does no one know I'm straight?

SinfulShipping - Mars & Jupiter

Jupiter: (no comment)

TBHShipping - Cyrus & Jupiter

Jupiter: Not like he;d ever feel any emotion other then hatred...

VioletTintShipping - Jessie & Jupiter

Jupiter: (still, no comment)

YouBoreMeShipping - Charon & Jupiter

Jupiter: ...

**Haine-chan – You gonna comment on them?**

Jupiter - ...

**Haine-chan – OKAY THEN! Onto Charon.**

Charon's Shippings:

BegrudgementShipping - Charon & Cynthia

Charon- Well...hee hee hee...she IS the Champion after all...

CreeperLabShipping - Charon & Saturn

Charon – No.

CyrusGroupieShipping - Charon & Mars

Charon - Never in a million years.

Mars – Isn't that how old you are?

Charon- This is why I said no!

DwarfplanetShipping - Charon & Skitty

Charon – This is out of the blue...

ElectricTentacleShipping - Charon & Rotom

Charon – Yes, I befriended it. Can people just leave it at that?

GeoSpectralShipping - Charon & Bertha

Charon – She MUST be older then me.

Mars- Which was a MILLION YEARS AGO!

Charon – Shut your mouth, impudent child!

GlobalShipping - Cyrus & Charon

Charon – HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Oh, you're serious?

MIGHTYShipping - Charon & Dawn

Charon – O_o'

PedophileShipping - Charon & Giratina

Charon – There would be a better chance with Cyrus.

PinkyAndTheBrainShipping - Charon & Pikachu

Charon – No.

SpectralKnowledgeShipping - Charon & Agatha

Charon - I thought she had a crush on Oak, the last time I checked...

TOOMUCHABUSEShipping - Charon & Detective Looker

Charon – He's Jupiter's...hee hee hee

YouBoreMeShipping - Charon & Jupiter

Charon – And she's Looker's...hee hee hee

**Haine-chan – I see Mars has an interest in his shipping's...onto Saturn!**

Saturn's Shippings:

CarefulShipping - Saturn & Ash

Saturn – Uh...no.

ConjuctionShipping- Saturn & Mars

Saturn – Well...I...ugh...we...really? Do people think we look good together?

**Haine-chan – Yes, you do!**

CreeperLabShipping - Charon & Saturn

Saturn – (*chokes on air*) WHAT?

CrescentShipping - Saturn & Barry

Saturn – No.

DragonstormShipping - Saturn & Cynthia

Saturn – No complaints here.

GingaShipping - Cyrus & Saturn

Saturn – Really?

GuardtheEntranceShipping - Saturn & Galactic grunt

Saturn – Which one...?

JovianShipping - Jupiter & Saturn

Saturn - Ha ha! No.

PandoraShipping - Saturn & Dawn

Saturn – Oh, please, tell that girl to get a proper wardrobe for Arceus' sake.

PrisonShipping - Detective Looker & Saturn

Saturn – He's all Jupiter's.

Toxicity Shipping - Saturn & his Toxicroak

Saturn – Just because my Toxicroak is my main Pokemon, doesn't mean I have some sort of relationship other then 'trainer and Pokemon' with it.

**Haine-chan - And now, Cyrus!**

Cyrus' Shippings:

AbsoluteControlShipping - Giovanni & Cyrus

Cyrus - ...

AkatsukiShipping - Cyrus & Dawn

Cyrus - ...

BashouShipping - Cyrus & Volkner

Cyrus - ...

BetelgeuseShipping- Mars & Cyrus

Cyrus - ...

ChaoticShipping - Cyrus & Palkia

Cyrus - ...

ChronosShipping - Cyrus & Dialga

Cyrus - ...

EmotionlessShipping - Cyrus & Weavile

Cyrus - ...

GingaShipping - Cyrus & Saturn

Cyrus - ...

GlobalShipping - Cyrus & Charon

Cyrus - ...

GodComplexShipping - Cyrus & Arceus

Cyrus - ...

InsensibleShipping - Detective Looker & Cyrus

Cyrus - ...

MizuhikiShipping - Cyrus & Cynthia

Cyrus - ...

PlatinaShipping - Cyrus & Giratina

Cyrus - ...

TBHShipping - Cyrus & Jupiter

Cyrus - ...

**Haine-chan – No comments, Cyrus? Fine, be that way. (*sticks tongue out at Cyrus who seems not to care*) Okay, this was fairly long, so I'll wrap it up. Thank you for reading and stay tuned! **


	8. Charon's Meltdown

**Alright everyone, I'm back! Finally! And that means another superbly-awesomely-randomly-cool topic! That was abused in so many ways...anywho on the topic! Hinae**

_Rose Emeraldfay  
_

_For a topic, how about asking TG which pokemon they would be if they were turned into one... I don't care about the team glatic characters much, but I like rotom. He's a backwards motor! (excuse the pun). *gives cyrus the darkest glare known to man and scars him for life* you ugly noob... I hate you *takes out sword* take this! *stabs cyrus's head*_

I'm better now! ^ ^

**Ooh, let's get started! **

Mars – Well, I'd probably want to be an Eevee, because you can evolve into so many different types.

Jupiter – You have to pick one Pokemon, and not its evolutions, stupid.

Mars – Oh, if my answer is so stupid, what's yours?

Jupiter – I'd go with something powerful, like a legendary or something.

Mars – You didn't pick the exact one, STUPID!

Jupiter – You didn't so why should I?

Mars – And to think, Cyrus picked YOU as a Commander...

Jupiter – Don't try it, sister.

Mars – What if I do?

Jupiter (inhuman growl) – BRING IT ON!

(Enter catfight here)

Haine-chan - O_0' So disturbing...

Saturn – I'd probably be a Toxicroak.

Haine-chan – Care to elongate, Saturn?

Saturn – Well, I own one, it is one of my favourite species of Pokemon, it is powerful, not only because of the dual type advantage, but because of its versatility, and it is very intimidating. Does it make sense to pick it?

Haine-chan – That's probably the most sophisticated answer we've had in this FanFiction. Kudos to you!

Cyrus – If it were up to me, I would be either Palkia or Dialga. That way, I could recreate this entire world and shape it into one that would be shaped and center around me! No one could get in my way and all would be mine! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

(Enter random maniacal laughter here.)

Haine-chan – You do know, Cyrus, that you can't create a new world without the Lake Trio. Ah, well, let an old man maniacally laugh if he wants. Ugh...I guess I have to ask Charon what he would—

Charon – I would be Rotom! Not only have I created a great bond with it, but I also discovered it! How many brilliant scientists can say THAT!

Haine-chan – Uh...lots.

Charon – LIKE WHO?

Haine-chan - I bet lots of different regional professor's have discovered numerous Pokemon species. Not just one, Charon.

Charon – HOW DARE YOU? ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME I'M A REJECT?

Haine-chan – Well, I—

Charon – THAT'S IT!

(Charon takes out shovel and is about to whack Haine-chan upside the head)

Haine-chan – Aaah!

(Enter shiny Moltres, who starts to peck the living daylights out of Charon)

Haine-chan – Oh. . .my. .. gosh. . . I thought that geezer was going to kill me!

Saturn – You know, you forgot about Triple Starred Groudon's shiny Moltres. He/she gave you the right away to terrorize us with it. And, you can use it to defend yourself as well.

Haine-chan – You...just saved my life, Saturn. I love you!

Saturn – Now, now, don't get too many ideas. Although, you DO owe me...

Haine-chan – I'll do anything!

Saturn - ...I'll think about it. Wait until the next topic.

**Haine-chan – Ok, then. Since everyone's busy, (except Saturn) I'll say thank you for waiting for this and I hope you don't mind waiting a bit longer for the next chapter! Stay tuned for Saturn's Confession!**

Saturn – It's not really a confession, per say...It's more of a request.


	9. Ruler of Time VS Ruler of Space

**Greetings, readers! The ninth topic has been picked and this is what it is!**

_ultima-owner_

_Who would win: Ruler of Time vs Ruler of Space?_

**Ooh, looks hard! Let's see what Team Galactic has to say!**

Saturn – The answer is simple: Ruler of Time. It can be controlled, manipulated and, ultimately, stopped. So many possibilities come with controlling time. Besides, what can you really do with space, anyways?

Jupiter – I beg to differ—Ruler of Space all the way! You could distort in a way that your opposition couldn't control their own movements, so that they couldn't control time!

Mars – True, but would Palkia handicap Dialga so much that it wouldn't be able to use the power of time to stop the other in its tracks? I don't think space is as powerful as time.

Cyrus – But, if you combine the two, the ultimate power to create a new universe would be at your fingertips!

Haine-chan – Ugh...Cyrus? The review says Ruler of Time _VS._ Ruler of Space, not the both of them combined. Don't think that by bringing it up every topic you'll somehow magically get a second chance at creating a 'new universe'. Firstly, it's not really possible: some kid will always be there to foil you're plans. If you'd watched _Scooby Doo,_ you'll realize that even more. Secondly, why would you even WANT to recreate the world? Let's just say you do: now what? Just sit around and be bored for the rest of your existence? That doesn't seem to appealing to me. Thirdly,

Jun – You tell 'em, Haine-chan!

Haine-chan – Jun, what are you doing here?

Jun – You said in a previous topic that guest stars would be appearing, so...here I am!

Haine-chan – I didn't invite you.

Jun – Oh, I know YOU didn't. Dawn did!

(Dawn blushes hard)

Haine-chan – Do I see a hint of TwinLeafShipping here? Oh, _cuuuuuute_! :3 So what's your opinion on this matter?

Jun – Well, I say their pretty evenly matched. Their both dieties of something. Space and time. Two really powerful...would I say 'elements' or 'powers'? I'll go with the latter. I think, personally, it would be Dialga. Like Saturn said, what can you really do with space, anyway? So you distort it so left is right and right is left. How will that help you win a fight against a ruler with the power to manipulate TIME, of all things? IT could just freeze you and kick your butt!

Haine-chan – Well put, Jun! ^.^

Jun – Well, I'd better get going—Saturn is giving me the death glare from the opposite corner. It's been nice talking with you, Haine! Thanks for the invite, Dawnie!

(Dawn blushes harder. Ash seems to be blowing smoke out of his ears.)

Haine-chan – It's Haine_-chan_, idiot! On the plus side, Dawn's got a crush! But, it seems like he's calling you 'Donny'. Like Donny Osmond or something. Ha ha...

(Saturn coughs loudly)

Haine-chan – Right! Any other thoughts?

Jupiter – Ruler of SPACE!

Mars – Ruler of TIME!

Jupiter – SPACE!

Mars – TIME!

Jupiter – SPACE!

Mars – TIME!

Jupiter – SPACE!

Mars – TIME!

Jupiter – SPACE!

Mars – TIME!

Haine-chan – This could go on for hours...-_-

(Saturn coughs louder)

Haine-chan – What is it? Do you have a cold? Want a Hall?

(Haine-chan chucks Citrus Hall at Saturn. He looks it over and then deliberately tosses it carelessly over his shoulder)

Haine-chan – 'O_o I loved that Hall...

(Saturn coughs even harder.)

Haine-chan – Jeez, what is it?

Saturn – You forgetting something, Haine-chan?

(Haine-chan ponders the thought. She then looks at the previous topic and then it hits her...)

Haine-chan – Oh, snap, I still owe you!

Saturn – And I've decided.

All – So? What is it?

Saturn – You'll have to write a one-shot for me.

Haine-chan – Okay...is that it?

Saturn – For now.

Haine-chan – Okay, then. What's the theme? Pairing? Plot?

(Saturn whispers everything into Haine-chan's ear)

Haine-chan – Oh, I get it! Okay, everyone! I think that wraps up this topic quite nicely. The winner, obviously, would be Dialga. Although I think its cry is quite pathetic when compared to Palkia. And Palkia's cooler, in my opinion. If you're wondering about Charon, I banned him from this FF until further notice. You know, after he tried to decapitate me in the last chappie...(shudders at memory _) Anywho, see you all later! R.I.P., Citrus Hall...


	10. Freaky Eye and Hair Colours

**Haine-chan: Oh my gosh I haven't updated this since August! I didn't even notice until now!**

**Saturn: Then what have you been doing for the past 4 months?**

**Haine-chan (*sweatdrop*): Well…you know, authoresses like me are very busy and…and…**

**Saturn: You forgot about it, didn't you?**

**Haine-chan: Yes. -_-**

**Saturn: And what of my request?**

**Haine-chan: I'm really coming along with it! I think it's super-awesome-fantastic-awesomesauce!**

**Saturn: You haven't started it.**

**Haine-chan: :( You're good. And this topic is good, too!**

someone

this is AWESOME! IMO, team Galactic didn't get enough screen time... Hmm... and a topic? Maybe you could ask Jupiter more about why she always says those funny little things that cause 'awkward sileces'! Or maybe ask Mars why she dyed her face? Or maybe you could ask WHAT THE FREAK IS GOING ON WITH THOSE HAIR COLORS! THEY MATCH THEIR EYES!

**Haine-chan: Well, start flapping your gums!**

Saturn: It's nice of them to say we don't get enough screen time. We didn't.

Jupiter (*blushing*): I don't say those things on purpose! They happen randomly! Awkward is awkward!

Mars: Are you sure about that one? Because from what I've heard from a reliable source, you're craving attention from a certain someone…Let's just say he likes to LOOK for the best girls in town.

Ash: Ha ha, good one Mars!

Mars: (slaps him) Shut up.

Ash: What was that for?

Mars: For being an idiot.

Ash: Okay! (***walks off with a smile on his face. Pikachu high-fives Mars and then leaves***)

Jupiter: Oh, what's this? A certain little boy has a crush on Marsy?

Mars: That sounds wrong.

Saturn: Why did you slap him?

Mars: He was annoying me.

Saturn: So, 'someone' asks 'why the freak' our eyes match our hair. Quotes. On. Everything.

Charon: Mine don't!

Jupiter: WE DON'T CARE!

Charon: (***grumbles away***)

Cyrus: Mine match. What about it?

Saturn: Well, sir, this 'someone' wants to know why. It 'freaks' it out.

Mars: 'It'?

Saturn: How am I to know the gender of an anonymous reviewer? It's not like there's a magical gender button that releases that information to the general public.

Haine-chan: That's a bit creepy.

Cyrus: Why is this person concerned with our phenotypes? They should be concerned about when my grand scheme will come to fruition!

Haine-chan: Wow, you're dropping some serious genetic lingo there Cyrus.

Cyrus: Do you have a problem with that?

Haine-chan (***backing away***): No, not at all...

Cyrus: That's right. You back away.

Mars: Maybe we were born that way.

Jupiter: Let's move onto the question that asks why Mars 'dyed her face'?

Mars: I think we should talk about your apparent love affair with Looker!

Jupiter: You're asking for it, sister!

Mars: Oh, you wish we were related!

Jupiter: No, I don't!

Mars: If we were, than you know who got all the looks and brains!

Jupiter: DIE!

(***They roll around clawing at each other in a pile of smoke. All others sweatdrop***)

Haine-chan: Okay, then I think we should wrap this up. I used the lines from All That. they had a sketch with Drake and Josh where they were wearing suits and they'd break into classes. Drake would always get the girl and Josh would be eating canoli. If he did something wrong, Drake would hit him on the arm and he'd go, "what was that for?" and Drake would say, "for being an idiot!" and he'd go "okay" nonchalantly. Man, I love that show. Too bad they canceled it. Oh, well. I'll see you guys in the next exciting topic! That will hopefully be updated in less than four months!

Saturn: And my one-shot will be uploaded too.

Haine-chan: Don't get your hopes up.


	11. Tastes in Food

**Haine-chan: Alright, so this is Topic 11! I don't know how long this FF is going to go on for, but I will keep writing until it gets old!**

**Saturn: It never gets old.**

**Haine-chan: sometimes, Saturn, it gets to the authoress. IT really does. Especially when I'm trying to do my "No-Story-Left-Forgotten-Update". Which, by the way, will happen on New Year's. So ti should be called "New Year's Bash Update Bonanza".**

**Saturn: Does that mean my—**

**Haine-chan: NO!**

**(*Saturn backs off*)**

**Haine-chan: Now the topic!**

_ultima-owner__  
Can the next Topic be what food they like and hate?_

**Haine-chan: This should be fun…hee hee hee…oh, I invited Silver to come and chat in today's topic, too. **

Jupiter: I really like sushi. It's so tasty and good. But the one thing I really won't eat ever even if I got a million dollars is Calamari.

Mars: What's Calamari?

Saturn: It's fried squid.

Mars: EWWWWW, GROSS!

Jupiter: And now you know why.

Silver: If you love raw fish then why wouldn't you like squid? They're both aquatic.

Jupiter: Who let you into this talk?

Silver: Haine-chan. Don't you remember the topic that allowed guest stars? I just happened to be picked.

Mars: Well, I really like pasta, especially Fettuccini Alfredo. But I don't like radishes.

Jupiter: Oh, so that's why you're so fat.

Mars: Oh, look at yourself, tubby.

Jupiter: How dare you!

Haine-chan: Are we going to get a catfight every time we have a new topic? It's getting old.

Saturn: They fight like this every day. That's why we never put them on the same missions.

Haine-chan: Oh…

Saturn: I enjoy Chicken a la King, but despise cookies.

Haine-chan: wow, royal food! Oh…so that's why you didn't eat the cookie I gave you in that other topic.

Saturn: And now you know. Never give me a cookie again.

Charon: Well, I love—

All: SHUT UP!

Charon: Why does everyone hate me…?

Silver (looking around suspiciously): Where's the boss, Cyrus?

(comes up from behind him from a dark shadow) Cyrus: I'm right here.

Silver (jumps back): Holy Sh—

(Silver gets hit by a piece of sushi)

Silver: What the—? Okay, who threw that?

Jupiter: Wasn't me…

Silver: I know it was! You know my father's the head of Team Rocket and I—

Haine-chan: Don't love him? Think he's a jerk because he abandoned you at such a young age? Don't agree with his sick and twisted motives?

Silver: That's creepy.

Cyrus: as you've probably observed before, I like coffee preferably from _Tim Horton's—_

Haine-chan: GO CANADA!

Cyrus: Ahem. And I do enjoy a good hamburger.

Haine-chan: Wait, you like hamburgers?

Cyrus: Yes now shut up and let me finish.

(Haine-chan sulks away)

Cyrus: Now the one thing I hate is chocolate. I can't stand the sweetness of the disgusting creation.

Silver: then I guess you won't be accepting any chocolates come Valentine's Day.

Haine-chan: I think I can officially say that this topic is done! That was some interesting stuff. Like learning favourites. Finding out that Cyrus is short tempered. Silver looking as frightened as a startled little kitten…

Silver: I did not! I deny that!

Haine-chan: Sure. Good thing I got it on camera. Now I can send it to Soul…

Silver: You wouldn't.

Haine-chan: Oh, you know I will. See you next time!


	12. Tema Plasma VS Team Galactic

**Haine-chan: Heyo! I'm back! And since Black and White hit shelves back in March, that means I can include them in my stories too! So today's special guest is…Ghetsis! And today's topic is…**

Wolfstar.e99  
who would win: Team galactic VS. Team plasma

Ghetsis: Obviously, the winner is Team Plasma. With my superior—I-I mean, our superior training and ideals, we would surely crush Galactic in the dust! Who do they think they are anyways, claiming to be making a new world without strife or imperfection?Such ideology is blasphemous! Our ideals are far more pure; liberation is what we need! Liberation will ensure peace and tranquility!

Cyrus: Um…who are you?

Ghetsis: (*gasp*) You know not who I am? I am GHETSIS of PLASMA! LEADER of Unova! KING of Pokemon! DICTATOR of—

Jupiter: Ok Mr. I'm-So-Cool-Because-My-Outfit-Looks-Like-A-Tower. We don't care about you or your team. Unova isn't even relevant. The main fact is that we could whoop your Plasmatic butt anytime.

Ghetsis: BLASPHEMOUS CHILD! How dare you insult me-I-I mean us!

Mars: Um…what's he on?

Charon: Cosmic Energy?

Saturn: No, Charon. That's what _you're_ on.

Haine: Let's not dwell on the sanity of his mind.

Mars: He sounds like a diehard preacher is you ask me.

Ghetsis: GENESECT WILL JUDGE YOUR SOUL!

Saturn: Genesect?

Haine: Oh, I see I'll have to fill you in. In Unova, they have all these different types of Pokémon, like Sinnoh. But Team Plasma decided to genetically create a Pokemon. They were going to release it on the general public in an attempt to rule the region, but a certain pair of brown-haired hero's stopped them in the nick of time…anyways, that's what he's referring to. And maybe he's religiously revering it…?

Cyrus: Now that's just sick.

Haine: Wait a sec—Cyrus, you wanted to destroy the world and make a new one that you would rule on your own whilst killing everything still living and you think _he's_ the sick one?

Cyrus: Of course.

Haine: -_-

Mars: Can you not invite him again?

Haine: Yeah, sure.

Jupiter: You should invite that foreign detective from Unova! I've heard he's so handsome and smart and…

Mars: It's Looker, isn't it?

Jupiter (blushing): I-I don't know what you're talking about! Aha ha ha ha~

Mars: What, is he wearing a new cloak or something?

Saturn: In conclusion, I would have to deduce that Team Galactic would win the battle. What with their ludicrous ideals about "liberating Pokemon" and the like, our superior technology and training would ensure an easy victory.

Haine: How technical of you! Well, there you have it folks! See you in the next chapter!

(*Sometime later in the abandoned room*)

Ghetsis (*bowing to corner of wall*): REPENT FOR YOUR SINS! MIGHTY GENESECT WILL RULE THE WORLD! (*hits wall on head*) Ouchies.


	13. Theories Surrounding Cyrus

**Haine-chan: Oh my gosh guys, what have I been doing for the past two years. O.o**

**Saturn: Not writing my one shot?**

**Haine-chan: Yes…**

**Mars: Not updating a single one of your fanfictions?**

**Haine-chan: Yeah…**

**Jupiter: Not including Looker in our topics?**

***Awkward Silence***

**Haine-chan: Well, today I published a new series, so I think I'm coming back! Y'all should cecki it out, it's called 'Venom'. If you're a fan of the Four Generals from HG/SS, this is the stuff for you! I sort of feel like I'm the only one writing them right now...So hey, Saturn, there may still be hope for you.**

**Saturn: I could always set my Toxicroak on you…**

**Haine-chan: *gulps* Ok, I'll think about it…**

**Saturn: *pulls our pokeball***

**Haine-chan: OK OK! Maybe within a month.**

**Saturn: *smiles wickedly***

**Haine-chan: Anywho, today's topic has been selected by Pokegal-Angella!**

_I forgot about this! This is super funny and made my day(yes it was that bad). I have an idea for a great topic. I wouldn't mind hearing their thoughts on some of the crazy theories people make up involving them. For example, one is that Dawn is Cyrus's daughter, Cyrus and Giovanni are related, Cyrus is Paul's father(I could actually see that one being true...), and so on. Yeah, most of the theories involve Cyrus but still, I wouldn't mind hearing their reactions._

Haine-chan: Ok guys, you may be a bit rusty, but talk away!

Cyrus: This reviewer has the gall to bring up such outlandish theories? Who created these anyways?

Haine-chan: Um…random people on the internet with a lot of time on their hands?

Saturn: Although most of these sound quite bizarre, I do agree with Pokegal on the Paul theory.

Haine-chan: Oh? Why?

Saturn: They both share the same lack of emotions and remorse that characterize them as self-proclaimed 'jerks'. And I suppose the genetics could work out.

Mars: The blue haired tramp? Cyrus' daughter? BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

Dawn: I HEARD THAT!

Jupiter: You know, she looks like a better love-child-match for you and a certain blue haired commander…hee hee hee…

Mars: *blush*

Saturn: Do you see the difference in the pigments of our hair? It could not be genetically possible. Besides, red hair is the dominant gene.

Haine-chan: But both hair colours are ridiculously bright…

Saturn: You haven't kept up your end of the bargain, so you have no right to shoot down my answers.

Haine-chan: Yes I can!

Saturn: *releases Toxicroak* Toxicroak, use—

Haine-chan: *starts crying and backing into a corner* OH MOTHER OF TOAST SPARE ME! ANYTHING BUT THE POISON!

All: *sweatdrop*

Ash: Uh…Haine…are you alright?

Haine-chan: *sniffle* I'll survive.

Mars: As long as you know how to love you know you'll stay alive?

Jupiter: You've got all your life to live and got all your love to give.

Mars and Jupiter: AND YOU WILL SURVIVE!

(*awkward silence*)

Dawn: People still listen to disco?

Brock: It would be interesting if Cyrus and Giovanni were related. It would set off a sort of power vacuum as to who would rule the world…whether it be this one or a new one…

Charon: I think Giovanni—

All: NO.

Charon: ...is quite attractive?

All: 0.0

Charon: What? An old man can dream.

(*Haine slowly crawls out of corner*)

Saturn: …

Jupiter: I think you've scarred Haine…

Saturn: *sighs* I have other ways of getting my story...

Haine-chan: And so, this girl is back on site and on a roll! Gosh, I can't believe I stopped writing for over two years…

Jupiter: By the way, why do you hate poison types?

Haine-chan: Every single villainous team has them, they're annoying as heck, they only have two weaknesses and I absolutely despise having my Pokémon be poisoned! And Saturn didn't help…

Cyrus: I'd say that is a good strategy on the team's part.

Haine-chan *evil glare* Til next time! And hopefully we will have no run ins with The-Pokémon-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named!


	14. If the World Ended and Then Some

**Haine-chan: I'm updating guys. I can't believe it. **

**Mars: It's only been a week—what's wrong with you?**

**Haine-chan: I'm actually…getting my butt into gear and doing work?**

**(*all gasp*)**

**Haine-chan: Well that's a good thing! I suppose I only have a few more topics to fulfill before I put this story to an end.**

**Ash: We should have a giant party to celebrate!**

**Haine-chan: And are you going to eat the hairy fruit that falls on the floor the whole night?**

**Ash: Maybe…**

**(*makes gagging sounds*) Anywho, here's this week's topic! It is a mix of two reviews!**

MeeLoveSaturnAndN:

LOVE IT! YOU MUST HAVE N GUEST STAR! HES MY HERO! I-I mean... Um... Hottie ( that sounded mor awkward didn't it) oh! And if possible have my other hottie Paul guest star. I love that little jerk! :p

Ideographer:

Okayz, first of all, want to know who started Dwarfplanetshipping(charonand skitty)? It was...some person, but I support it! So yes, Charon has a fangirl! (protects charon using golf club) In any case, my topic stuff. If Cyrus actually created a new planet/universe/punch in the face, what would everyone else do? Besides run, scream, look for looker(lol) etc.

Haine-chan: Hmm interesting. Go on!

Saturn: Before I give my opinion, what does Ideographer mean by 'punch in the face'?

Haine-chan: I don't actually know. But try answering anyways!

Saturn: Hmm…I suppose I would attempt to take control of the grunts and take shelter in our base in the hopes of escaping the looming apocalypse.

Mars: I'd probably take my Pokémon and travel to the lowest point in Sinnoh, since that would be the farthest point away from Mt. Coronet.

Jupiter: I would totally not look for a strong and handsome detective to protect me.

*eye roll*

Jupiter: I need a hero if the world is going to end!

Cyrus: I of course, would be basking in the glory of my newly created world, celebrating the end of strife and finally achieving what I have been trying to obtain for years!

Charon: I have a fan girl?! Screw the end of the world! I'm moving in and living with her!

*All* GO AHEAD!

Haine-chan: Make my day!

*silence*

Haine-chan: No? No one got that reference?

(*N slowly approaches behind Haine*)

N: *whispers* Who is this woman who adores me so much?

(Haine jumps from astonishment) Oh h-hey N! P-please don't do that again. But to answer your question, she's just a fan of yours who is very…attached to you.

N: And I thought people who abused Pokémon were odd…

Jupiter (walks up to N and leans against his shoulder): Hey chickadeelicious. I don't know where you're from, but I like tall, white, foreign men. You can abuse me any day.

N: What is wrong with you? *backs away*

Mars: Whoa whoa whoa whoa what? Are you hitting on someone other than Looker?

Jupiter: Oh come on baby, don't run! You know you want me!

*Cyrus punches Jupiter away from N and hovers around him like a vulture.*

N: May I help you sir?

Cyrus: I've seen you before…

Saturn: You have?

N: I cannot say you don't stir up old memories within me.

Haine-chan: Wow this is juicy! Explain!

Cyrus: Your father and I were partners during my scientific research.

N: My foster-father, you mean.

Cyrus: Whilst I had an interest in atoms, matter, the formation of the earth and machines, Ghetsis had a keen interest in genetics and how they impacted not only humans but Pokémon. He could never fill his head with all the knowledge he needed in Sinnoh, so he left to further his research…

N: And he came to Unova to do so. He talked of a man with ideals to pursue a world without strife or emotion…he called you a madman and told me that you were why humans shouldn't use Pokémon to fuel such madness.

Cyrus: What I never understood was how you came into the equation.

N: I was an orphan, alone if it weren't for him. He surrounded me with abused Pokémon in an attempt to warp me into his ideals.

Cyrus: Only he could never truly get the genetic code right.

N: So he created the only thing he knew would achieve his goals should I fail.

Both: Genesect.

Haine-chan: I think I've just witnessed a new story plot.

Saturn: Oh my…

Jupiter: What a torn and shattered man…I'll fix him up!

Mars: Shut up! I'm trying to listen.

N: Did your ideals come to fruition, Cyrus? Or did the bond that Pokémon and humans have shatter your dreams?

Cyrus: Your hypothesis is correct. While I hate to admit defeat to a child, she was able to break my perfect world with the…terrible love she harboured for her beloved Pokémon.

N: *smiles* I knew it would. The equation adds up perfectly.

Charon: How is he so smart?!

Haine-chan: He's N so shut up.

Saturn: This is intriguing…Ghetsis and Cyrus having a past.

Mars: But I thought he was the crazy man from a few topics back.

Haine-chan: Well this story is pretty flawed when it comes to accurately portraying characters. But this has turned out to be a very wonderful topic! I believe I will only do one more topic (unless some more people review) and we'll wrap it up! See you then!


	15. The Final Chapter of Awesomeness!

**Haine-chan: Guess what guys? This is going to be the last chapter EVER!**

**Jupiter: Oh no!**

**Mars: Can it be?**

**Saturn: Really?**

**Cyrus: *nothing***

**Charon: YES!**

***everyone stares at the old man***

**Charon: What? That means I won't be pushed around anymore!**

**Haine-chan: I know you guys have been waiting for this for a while so…hit him with your best shot!**

***All commanders, including Cyrus, release their signature Pokémon***

**Mars: We have been waiting SO long for this!**

**Saturn: This victory will be so very sweet.**

**Jupiter: Yeah, almost as sweet as the moment I'll kiss that detective!**

**Haine-chan: Um, guys, aren't you going to say to her that—**

**All: ATTACK!**

*Charon is blasted through the roof and into the sky*

Charon: I'm blasting my way into your heart, Ideographer!

*TWINKLE*

Haine-chan: Well now that that's settled, we can get to the final topic!

Saturn: Which is?

Haine-chan: Another mix of two! This one is submitted by Alex View.

_P.S please add a diary reading chapter ._

Haine-chan: And then…a la Ephie!

_I don't know if I could really think of anymore topics, but . . . hmm. Have they discussed Cyrus's age yet? I seriously do not believe that he is 27 even if the game says so. He looks like he's 42 at best. No one will convince me otherwise._

Haine-chan: Go on! TALK LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW! WHICH IS MOSTLY TRUE.

Mars: Well, I suppose we'll have to start with the topic of Cyrus' age, seeing as we haven't found anyone's diary yet. In my opinion, he looks like he's 35, tops. It's mostly the face that does it for me.

Saturn: Not a day over 30.

Jupiter: Meh, I'd say 39.

Haine-chan: Wow, so none of you guys think he looks his age?

All: Nope.

Cyrus: I would like to add that my physical appearance has nothing to do with my ideals and pursuits.

Haine-chan: Yeah, yeah, bud, we've heard that excuse before. But how do you feel about that, by the way?

Cyrus: I believe that I look my age, albeit despite my hollow cheekbones. Yes, genetics were not as you would say "good to me".

Haine-chan: Well, we've all got our faults, I suppose. Oh, that reminds me, I have to introduce my last guest! And it is…Giovanni!

All: WHAT?

*Giovanni walks in with his awesome fedora*

Giovanni: Greetings.

Jupiter: Oh wow! A real man!

Mars: Oh come on, you're just saying that so we won't pick on you for liking Looker.

Jupiter *starts drooling*: I'm serious! That is one hunk of man meat! Hamina hamina hamina!

Ash: That's a lot of haminas.

Haine-chan: Oh right, I invited Ash and the gang too because they wanted to have a party so…yeah.

Saturn: Where's the cake?

Haine-chan: Hidden. Until we finish talking about our stuff.

*Giovanni approaches Haine-chan* Thank you for inviting me. Solitary training can get very tiresome.

Haine-chan: Hey no problem. The more the merrier! And besides, we needed another mature voice to add to our discussion.

Giovanni: What are you discussing?

Haine-chan: Oh the usual. How old we think Cyrus over there is—oh he's the guy sipping his Tim Horton's coffee in the corner. And in a bit we're going to read diary entries.

Giovanni: Hmm…I'd say he looks about 28 years old.

Ash: WHAT!

Mars: No way!

Haine-chan: Really?

Cyrus: Finally! A man with a mind!

Saturn: Are you sure you don't know each other?

Giovanni: I've never met the man, I can assure you.

*Cyrus walks away from his corner*: Do you happen to know anything about subspace and the flow of time?

Giovanni: Do you happen to know about running an international crime syndicate?

Cyrus: I believe this could be the start of a beautiful friendship.

*The two walk off to converse about evil things*

Haine-chan: Well now that those guys have each other, we can rummage through everyone's diaries!

*Everyone hands over their diaries, except Jupiter*

Mars: Come on Jupy, play nice.

Jupiter: This is a breach of my privacy! I demand a lawyer!

Haine-chan: There are no lawyers here, so you're out of luck. *swipes diary like a boss*

Jupiter: HEY!

Haine-chan: Ok, who's first in my pile? Ash!

Dawn: Aw, that sucks, the only thing that's written here is what Pokémon he's caught and how much he wants to be the Pokémon champion. Boring!

Haine-chan: Alright moving on!

Brock: Here's Dawn's: "_Dear Diary. Today I joined Ash on his journey to become a Pokémon Master. He's pretty cute, but I'll totally become the champion before he does! Just watch me!"_

Haine-chan: Aw, that's adorable.

*Dawn blushes*: Well that was a while ago.

Haine-chan: Here's Saturn's.

Saturn: Oh dear God.

Haine-chan: "_Dear Diary. Today I was forced to go to Haine-chan's place for another round of dull topics to discuss. The only highlight was seeing her smile. That and Cyrus actually speaking of something other than the imminent doom of the world. I wonder if she'll ever write my one-shot."_

Saturn: Give me that back.

*Haine-chan blushes slightly*: You like my smile?

*Ash slides up beside Haine-chan*: Do you know Flash? Because your smile could light up a dark cave!

*Dawn punches him in the stomach*: Don't turn into another Brock.

Saturn: Well…it is quite nice.

Haine-chan: Tee hee!

Saturn: By the way, is my one-shot still in the trash bin?

Haine-chan: Actually, no. I'm still going to write it. I have a real idea for it now, so I'm hoping to get it up soon!

Saturn: That's good to hear. I was afraid I was going to have to set my Toxicroak on you…

Haine-chan: AIEE~

Dawn: Here's Mars' diary! "_Dear Diary. Jupiter won't shut up about her obsession with Detective Looker. I mean, how is it that a person can become so completely mad about another person that they become annoying to no extent? Sometimes I wish I had someone I could obsess over. Well, I suppose Saturn counts…"_

Dawn: I knew it!

Mars: Aw crud.

Saturn: Does that mean I'm part of a love triangle?

Haine-chan: Quick! Read Jupiter's!

Saturn: "_Dear Diary. Today I ran into Detective Looker while he was on the job. He was attempting to thwart my plans at the Fuego Ironworks, but I gained the upper hand. He's a very talented man, but he was no match for me. As he was lying on the ground, I noticed his eyes. They were deep and complex and I couldn't help but get lost in them. Maybe the next time I see him I find a way through them."_

Mars: Holy.

Haine-chan: Crap.

Ash: Wow, you're so poetic, Jupiter!

Jupiter: So I took lots of poetry classes in school.

Saturn: And to think, we all thought you were incapable of such literate thoughts.

Jupiter: Looks can be deceiving, can't they?

Haine-chan: Hey you guys! Giovanni and Cyrus! You got any diary entries you wanna share?

Giovanni: I'm afraid I haven't written an entry in decades.

Cyrus: I have no need for such a thing. It only records disgusting emotions.

Haine-chan: Fine, whatever. I'm sure Giovanni's son would have some cool stuff written down in his diary.

*Giovanni's face turns cold*

Haine-chan: What? Did I say a spoiler? Have I transported us to subspace?!

Dawn: Nope, we're all ok.

*Suddenly, Silver walks in!*

Ash: A wild Silver appeared!

*Silver punches Ash in the face*

Silver: Father.

Giovanni: Son.

Cyrus: Ugh, you have a son? Our friendship is ruined.

Silver: I thought you were in solitary training.

Giovanni: I still am. I'm taking a quick reprieve.

Silver: And you never told me?

Giovanni: You needn't know my every action.

Silver: But I'm your son! You can't just leave me in the dark about these things!

Haine-chan: Hold up guys, topic-counselor here. I know you two don't have the best relationship in the world.

Silver: You can say that again.

Haine-chan: But that doesn't mean you don't care for one another. It's just the way you guys are. Giovanni prefers to be alone, but that doesn't mean he's stopped caring for you Silver. And you prefer to make your own path, and that doesn't mean you don't care for him either. You'll never forget one another and you might not be able to see each other that often but it's important to live in the moment and really communicate with each other while you have the chance!

Saturn: Why aren't you a real counselor?

Haine-chan: Because the job market sucks.

Silver: I guess you're right.

Giovanni: I suppose so.

Haine-chan: You know what would make this moment even sweeter?

Both: What?

Haine-chan: CAKE!

*rolls out multi-layered cake*

Dawn: Wow, Haine-chan, that looks amazing!

Haine-chan: Thank you, internet!

Ash: Are you an HM? Cause you're unforgettable!

*Everyone begins to chow down. Looker and Jupiter are at the table and they both reach for the same knife to cut their cake with, hands brushing each other's*

Looker: Would you allow me to do the honour?

Jupiter: You can honour me any day!

*They start making out*

Haine-chan: Wow that escalated quickly.

Mars: Well at least we can stop heckling her about it.

Ash: Let's make like a super rod and hook up!

Haine-chan: Kay enough.

*Suddenly, the Four Executives show up!*

Haine-chan : Meep!

Saturn: Aren't those the people we talked about in the first topic?

Giovanni: My comrades.

Haine-chan: Me gusta.

Archer: Greetings, Giovanni. We've waited for this moment for so long.

Ariana: Finally, you will take your rightful place as the head of Team Rocket once more and lead us to glory!

*Haine-chan runs over to Dawn*

Haine-chan: Hide me!

Dawn: Why?

Haine-chan: Because Proton's here!

Brock: What's the problem?

Dawn: She has a big crush on him, apparently.

Proton: All of the necessary arrangements have been made in advance, Giovanni.

Petrel: Your reign over the Pokémon world will never end!

Haine-chan: And my love for you will never end! Whoops!

Giovanni: *smiles* It is so good to know there are still followers of mine who believe in me. I think my time in solitary training has ended. *Turns to Silver* My son. There is always a position for you in Team Rocket, if you wish it.

Silver: I'll become stronger than you! And one day, I'll take down Team Rocket and you, once and for all!

Giovanni: I look forward to that day.

*Just as they're about to leave, Proton notices Haine-chan hiding behind Dawn*

Proton: Hmm? Who's that?

Dawn: Uh, nothing! Nothing at all!

*Pushes Dawn away to reveal a very red-faced Haine-chan*

Proton: *smiles* What do we have here?

Haine-chan: A very embarrassed fan girl?

Proton: A fan girl, eh? Well, maybe Giovanni's ascension to the head of Team rocket will have to wait a bit.

*Haine-chan sighs happily. The two begin to leave the room*

Haine-chan: Well, that's all folks! Thanks for coming along for the journey! It's been a lot of fun, despite all of the doom and gloom of Cyrus. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an Executive to hang with!

Ash: Ooh ooh, this is the best one yet! Do you know Tail Whip? Because your beauty leaves me defenseless!


End file.
